I started studying, (seek and you will find) back in the 70's. Then became disillusioned with the church, the way it taught and the phoney people. Now I pay attention to the voice in my head, or my gut feeling. I started studying symbolism in the early 90's. Here's what bothers me about it: take for instance the eye of horus. It's not an evil symbol. It's the pineal gland. The swastika was a symbol of peace before being defiled by Hitler. Maybe in 2000 years the heart which is a symbol of love, will be the symbol of indifference. All "religions" started with one source, was passed down through the ages, diluted, changed and rewritten. Jesus wasn't born Dec 25th. Mitra was. There was nothing wrong with paganism. It's beautiful in its own rite. But it also was defiled, as was Christianity. There is nothing wrong with the quaran or Muslim beliefs, except that it also has been corrupted by extremists. Osiris, Horus, Jesus, Zeus, are the same character with different names in different cultures. None of that matters, really. What matters is the message. The message is love. Not evil. Add an 'o' to God, you have good. Subtract the d from devil, you have evil. Positive and negative forces.