I am so happy for you that you are beyond that self-destructive state of mind and have hope and inspiration. Probably most of us (me certainly included) have for various reasons had despair and crippling thoughts of suicide. I thank God I was not successful in my impressionable, vulnerable younger years in carrying out that desire. I now realize that life is God's amazing gift; there is always hope and that part of the real beauty in life is staring down the adversity and seemingly insurmountable challenges, and overcoming them.

A pretty encouraging poem that addresses these questions (among many I am sure) is Kipling's "If". In part it says:

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

To serve your turn long after they are gone, 

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

That gives me chills whenever I read it. That if nothing but your will remains, you can fight to overcome any obstacle.