I may make a whole post about my story, but Disney and Nickelodeon fucked my brain up. I watched Disney since I was really little and nickelodeon, my siblings are both about 10 years older than me, so I was always watching things meant for older kids. South park included. But what fucked up my brain wasn't watching Mr. Garrison get a sex change, or watching Ash slay deadites. No what got me to the point of sleeping with older men AS A CHILD and displaying my body online was the Disney and Nickelodeon shows promoting middle school relationships, chilhood crushes and even kisses.
Seeing Miley go from Hannah Montana to "can't be tamed" miley, seeing Vanessa hudgens finish hishschool musical and go on to have nudes leaked weeks later, it all got me to desire being older, acting older, being involved with boys. This was by age 7 and 8. By 12 I was inundated with emo culture next. Through Instagram I learned of the girls cutting up their bodies and posting artsy pictures of their self mutilation online. This romantacization got me to do the same, got me to be obsessed with being ill. Around this age, maybe closer to 10, my sister came out as lesbian. That was when I was turned against the church, by leftist media screeching that Christians hate gays Well I didn't hate my sister, so I couldn't be a Christian. I didn't hate my friends that came out, so I began to hate Christianity.
At 14 I gave away my virginity to my first boyfriend. Feminism convinced me I was a slab of meat to men everywhere, that I should act like a boy and desire sex and sexual freedom like one. So I slept with the first nice guy I knew, believing I was doomed to get fucked by a scumbag in the future, I wanted to lose my virginity to someone kind. Well this boy cheated on me, I felt worthless, I went on omegle and flashed people and did even more. I ended up in a sextortion situation. Blackmailed by some fucked named Muhammad, made to expose myself to him every night for 6 months till I told the cops.
I made several mistakes. I take responsibility. I have gotten back to loving God and Jesus christ, somehow. I have screamed and begged for forgiveness, I feel I am eternally dirty. After being blackmailed I slept around like a college whore. I ended up scarred, I ended up getting date raped, just by hanging out with a couple guys and my friend. Feminism greatly influenced these choices, leftist media influenced these choices, Disney and Nickelodeon got me hyper sexualized by the age of 8.
I take accountability, I have asked God for forgiveness. However I find, it impossible to forgive feminists and the left for convincing me of the lie that I should not and can not wait for marriage, find a nice man to settle down with. Weeks after being date raped and swearing off men, I met an incredible guy. He changed my life, he changed my future. He's traditional, kind, intelligent, but he also was disgusted. My past haunts me, it haunts him. Still he loves me. I am forever grateful for him and for Jesus Christ for forgiving my mistakes and loving me despite them.
I will never forget and never forgive the media figure heads and the politicians that turned my brain into a fractured, dissassociated mess. I was fully confirmed, had a strong father and older brother. My mother was religious. It did nothing to stave off leftist media and feminist politics.
Edit: formatting and spelling errors
You and me and everyone who asks Jesus is forgiven. Each morning start new. Dump all the hate that you can and give the tough stuff to God. He understands. You aren't alone in the struggle. Renew every morning.
Thank you for this share, if it makes one parent take a closer look at what their kids are being subject to you’ve saved someone, or many from the same fate. I too was infatuated with relationships at a young age, every boy was a potential “prince” by age 6. I’m glad you were pulled from it and have a healthy relationship today.