It's like finding a mathematical formula. First you have formulas that kind of work, not for all cases, and they don't explain many things. Then you find a formula that fits EVERYWHERE and fails to be proven false no matter what you subject it to. I remember my first venture into spirituality reserving myself and telling myself, well, this may all be a waste of time, so I'll allocate only time I'd be willing to waste. But soon after the truth dawned on me and I was changed forever. There is no turning back. You will find this too, if you persist. And you need no cult, religion, organization or belief or control system for that.
This. I have nothing to add, your words sing truth and beauty. We love you, XXX, you are an anon full of energy and conviction. Yet there is so much to be learned, there are new positive truths to be discovered all the time. We only wish you see them, give them a chance.