>"Hello fellow Americans, your entire government was a corrupt globalist criminal enterprise funded by the Saudi's and Israelis. Every piece of legislation created in the last 25 years was part of a global effort to subvert your society and imprison you all by a group of elites you have never heard of. By the way, they are all satanists that sacrifice and rape children, because all of the world governments take part in a massive human trafficking operation. That's right, every government on Earth is guilty of abject treason and unimaginable horrors. 9/11 was done by the US government, as well as every other major attack in the world
I think this statement will be perfect if they just end it with "Have a nice day" like the Vogons.