I'll try to give some advice, even if i'm young myself.
First you've got to remember that you must first seek the kingdom of God and after that, all things will be added unto you. I congratulate you for trying to be righteous, however, i think you might be doing that so you can get material good and sucess. But that's not the most important thing, the most important thing is saving your soul and reaching the kingdom of Heaven and pleasing God whatever it takes, with shooting yourself or attempting to get a deal with the devil as options, it's clear you don't have the ultimate goal in mind. I am not doing this out of malice or to chastise you, just trying to guide you. Read the book of Job. The lives of the saints.
Also you are so young! You definitevely hasn't wasted your life or something, you barely started out! Relax a bit and don't be so hard on yourself. Talk with your parents, i'm sure they will understand your struggle.
Listen, all of us here don't want you doing anything stupid. I'm praying and rooting for you!
God love you