Feedback as a reader not a meme maker, but with some background in graphics:
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I love that pic and it stops me to look & read
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font too small
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font's detailed style competes with details in pic where text is placed, yet plenty of flat colour at top of pic has not been used.
for attention grab
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use blocky text (as in the post above yours)
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or else make fancier fonts much bigger
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vary the font size to emphasise important words or phrases
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cut up the paragraph into 'single thought' lines (like bullet points)
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ensure high contrast for readability (eg colour, outline, dark/light)
Tip for speed: Notice when a meme catches your attention and informs you. Copy its layout, text placement, font styles but using your chosen graphics & text. Repeat with many more memes until the creation becomes instinctive and self-inspired … now you are an artist!
God bless your endeavours, memefag!