>>10803478

Speaking of "shameful antics… for the keks

(Satire Alert)

#metoo changes name to #hetoo ahead of Trump’s female SCOTUS pick

sauce: https://genesiustimes.com/metoo-changes-name-to-hetoo-ahead-of-trumps-female-scotus-pick/

"WASHINGTON DC—The civil rights #metoo campaign, which was pivotal in the fight against literal Hitler Brett Kavanaugh has changed its name to #hetoo ahead of President Trump’s female Supreme Court pick.

Trump has said that he will choose a woman for the Supreme Court to fill the late Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg‘s seat. The most likely candidate is the horrifying so-called “woman” Amy Coney Barrett, who is Catholic and has dared to have more than 1.3 children.

Several people have already come forward with claims of sexual assault against the nominee, whoever it turns out to be.

“We’re clearly going to have to figure out something different,” #hetoo founder Vanessa Horseface said. “Since it’s not as obvious that a woman hates women as much as say Kavanaugh did, we’re going to try the #hetoo angle in support of the Patriarchy.”

“We love the Patriarchy now because Amy Barrett is a threat to the Patriarchy and we’re against Amy Barrett no matter what because Trump nominated her,” Horseface added."

>>10803536

Amy Coney Barrett Holds Press Conference In Handmaid's Tale Costume Just To Mess With Liberals

sauce: https://babylonbee.com/news/amy-coney-barrett-holds-press-conference-in-handmaids-tale-uniform-just-to-mess-with-liberals

"WASHINGTON, D.C.—Shortlisted for Trump's Supreme Court appointment, Judge Amy Coney Barrett held a press conference today where she wore a Handmaid's Tale costume just to freak the Left out.

Barrett walked out in the red cloak and white bonnet, causing most of the reporters gathered to pass out instantly.

"If selected to serve on the Supreme Court, I look forward to forcing women to have babies and ushering in a Catholic theocracy," she said, holding back laughter. "In fact, the first decision I want to hand down is that women who don't have at least seven babies will be executed."

"All hail the Pope! All hail the Pope! All hail the Pope!"

"When you're getting accused of being a theocratic fascist, sometimes you just have to play along," she said afterward as she took off her red robe, revealing her normal black robe underneath. "It's fun to watch them freak out a bit."

She then jumped in her minivan and drove off to drop five of her kids off at soccer practice before going to hear a case as part of her extremely successful career."

>>10803610

Another Babylon Bee… for the keks

Democrats: 'Without Abortion, Women Might Have To Settle For Having 7 Kids And Sitting On The Highest Court In The Land'

sauce: https://babylonbee.com/news/democrats-without-abortion-women-might-have-to-settle-for-having-7-kids-and-sitting-on-the-highest-court-in-the-land

"WASHINGTON, D.C.—Democrats are lamenting after Trump revealed his nomination to take Justice Ginsburg's seat on the Supreme Court: Amy Coney Barrett. Experts say that Amy Coney Barrett will set women's rights back approximately 6000 years since Judge Barrett is one of those weird Catholics who "actually believe all that stuff." The greatest fear, according to 95% of people with purple hair, is that she will take away everyone's sacred right to kill their own children in abortion.

"What will we do without abortion?" said Peg Butterwiggles, one of the women protesters interviewed outside the Supreme Court. "Without abortion, women may have to settle for throwing their careers away by having seven kids and then sitting on the seat of the most powerful court in the land!"

Progressive leaders are worried that Amy Coney Barrett serving on the Supreme Court may send the wrong message to little girls around the country that a full and meaningful life is actually possible without Planned Parenthood.

"Look how happy and powerful she looks," said Butterwiggles. "It's disgusting! Everyone knows it's literally impossible to have a life worth living unless you kill all your kids to please the CEO of your supply chain company in order to have a healthy 401K!"

Prominent intellectual Lena Dunham expressed similar concerns saying, "This is literally The Handmaid's Tale. We're all about to get oppressed by men who want to marry us and give us children and provide for our every need until we die together holding hands in a hospital bed! Gross!"

After Trump's announcement, the group of protestors shrieked at the sky one last time as their human rights slipped away forever. "

>>10803547

kek

>>10803547

Make it rain…