‘America! You can’t even choose a president without ending up in court… now’s the time for you to come back home to Britain’
5 Nov, 2020 14:55
By Charlie Stone, author and journalist who has worked for the BBC, several national newspapers in the UK and international media.
The UK is crashing out of Europe, and the US looks to be heading for civil war. There’s an obvious solution: reconciliation. Here’s an idea of how the Queen may be looking at things as she views proceedings from Buckingham Palace…
…..
America! You've been very, very naughty boys and girls. Throwing all that tea into the harbour at Boston… that wasn’t very civil of you, was it? It just wasn’t cricket. You didn’t even bring any cream and sugar.
Then, by golly, you just declared your independence and walked away. I mean, really, how very impolite.
But we – the royal ‘we’ that is – forgive you. That was almost 250 years ago now. Let bygones be bygones. Why don’t you come home to Britain? Come back to the Motherland!
No? Well, just look at the mess you’ve got yourselves into on your own, hmmm? You can’t even count. That’s what your orange-faced president says, anyway, and half of you seem to believe every word he says.
READ MORE
No, a Joe Biden win wouldn’t spell the end for Brexit or populism…despite what the ‘elite’ try to tell youNo, a Joe Biden win wouldn’t spell the end for Brexit or populism…despite what the ‘elite’ try to tell you
There are now over 330 million of you American souls. Yet your choice for leader boiled down to two elderly gentlemen screaming at each other across TV studios and the internet. Now it’s all set to become a two-month-long courtroom drama.
Was this really the best you could do?
Last time out, you picked a dodgy businessman turned reality TV show star whose only gift seems to be his ability to sell you absolutely anything while he screams his way across the world stage. This chubby chap could drop his trousers live on air in a boxing ring, yet still could count on the vote of half the country.
And the other half?
You chose an old chap called Joe who can barely remember his own name, the perfect American to step into the ring and take Mr Trump on in a fist fight. No matter that you need to spin him around to make sure he’s facing the right direction.
One can hear the shouts from the blue corner: “Hey Joe! Joe! He’s over there! The guy with the orange face and silly hairdo! Yeah, that's him! Use your ears, he doesn't stop talking! Jab jab! Duck! Jab!”
And this Trump character, the one in the red corner, the chap who just cannot stop tweeting, even when it’s in his own best interest to do so… is he the world's first-ever 74-year-old teenager?
One has just been reading on the internet that he is taking various states to court to try to stop people counting votes. Yet presumably he would allow through any which have HIS name on them? How very, very strange. And if Mr. Biden wins this imminent court case to be president, he will be 78 when he takes office.
https://www.rt.com/op-ed/505709-america-election-court-uk/
and they think people will believe this shit? not anymore