One Mask, Two Masks, I Mask, You Mask

 

One mask, two mask, I mask, you mask.

He masks, she masks, old masks, new masks.

This one is N95.

This one keeps your mom alive.

Say! You should wear them when you drive.

 

Yes, when you’re alone, or in your home

You still need a mask around your dome.

Masks are good for you and me

And two are better than one, you see.

But why two masks for you and me?

I do not know, ask the CDC.

 

From there to here,

From here to there,

Double masks are everywhere.

Here are some that you can weave.

And here are some that won’t let you breathe.

Here are some that will make you giggle.

And here are some that let you virtue signal.

 

I wear two masks to save your life,

And your parents, kids, and wife.

Now you wear two to save all mine,

If you don’t my grandma dies.

 

I wear two masks to show I care.

Oops! I just passed out for lack of air.

Masks get bigger and masks get littler

And if you don’t wear two, you’re worse than Hitler.

 

One mask, two masks, three masks, four masks

We should be wearing even more masks.

Five masks, six masks, even seven

Why stop there? Just wear eleven.

What’s that you say? More masks don’t work?

Quit being anti-science, jerk.

 

Wear 15 masks at home, at work,

In bed, the bath, or in the shower

Wear 20 masks every hour!

If you don’t I’ll call the cops

‘Til all this anti-masking stops

 

Wear 30 masks ‘til you’re vaccinated

And then you might be liberated.

Wait, never mind, new science came out

You must wear masks forever, there is no doubt

Don’t complain and please don’t shout

Just put on 50 masks and shut your mouth.

 

 

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