Stay on your path filled with Light.
They have their own contracts to live out and perhaps in the future they too will see a bit of Light that opens a new path for them each that will find its way back to you.
Do things that bring you happiness, raise your frequency in Light, pray, meditate, research, but your path is yours and theirs, as adults, are theirs.
People are drawn to Light (think bug zapper) why narcists are attracted to higher Light frequency people. Praying for you and your children. Life does not always turn out like we envision, but God's plans do. Hang in there.
Signed, alienated Parent Anon of 3 adult g