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Compromise: In Lieu Of Eucharist, Priest To Offer Biden Non-Blessed But Delicious Vanilla Wafer
WASHINGTON, D.C.—After Catholic bishops stirred bitter controversy this week by asking people to repent of murder, Father Brian Shannon has offered President Biden a tasty compromise: replacing the Eucharist with a ‘Nilla wafer.
“While as Catholics we must object to unifying the body, soul and divinity of Christ to someone who is unrepentant in their support of murder, we fully support President Biden’s right to enjoy a vanilla wafer,” said Father Shannon. “Now can a vanilla wafer undergo transubstantiation? Really getting into the metaphysical weeds here, but to be safe we’ll leave them off the altar until Joe comes up and pull the ol’ switcheroo.”
President Biden has reportedly been outraged over a movement to deny him the eucharist, claiming that he does not personally support murder, but simply supports women’s access to murder. He also supports forcing the public to pay for murder, and wants to eliminate tax dollars going to crisis pregnancy centers that offer alternatives to murder – but to be clear, once again, he does not like murder.
Sources say that President Biden has yet to notice the change, but did remark that Communion has been extra tasty lately and always gives him a hankering for milk.
https://babylonbee.com/news/compromise-in-lieu-of-eucharist-priest-to-offer-biden-non-blessed-but-delicious-vanilla-wafer/?utm_source=telegram&utm_medium=link&utm_campaign=telegram
Biden Says Latinx Aren't Getting Vaccinated Because Their Giant Sombreros Make It Impossible To Enter Pharmacies
RALEIGH, NC—It looks like President Joe Biden is not going to meet his goal of 70% of adults vaccinated by July 4th, and in a recent statement to the press during his “month of action” campaign, he explained why he believes there is some vaccination hesitancy, especially among minorities.
“It’s just hard for many minorities to get vaccinated,” Biden said. “For instance, many Latinx won’t get vaccinated because the giant sombreros they’re wearing make it impossible for them to get through the door at Walgreens to get their vaccination shots.”
Many of the press seemed confused by the statement, so Biden elaborated. “There are two things I know about Latinx: One — they all love being called ‘Latinx.’ Two — they are constantly wearing these giant round hats called ‘sombreros’ — ones too big to fit through the average pharmacy door. So what’s the solution to getting Latinx vaccinated? I dunno. Maybe there is no solution.”
Biden also gave his theories on why more African-Americans aren’t getting vaccinated, but we’d be canceled if we even repeated them.
https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-says-latinx-arent-getting-vaccinated-because-their-giant-sombreros-make-it-impossible-to-enter-walgreens
Doesn't exist bakes, looked at both Dan's accounts, check yourself.
https://twitter.com/DanScavino
https://twitter.com/Scavino45
>>13985815 (SAUCE NEEDED) Dan Scavino Tweet - GOP Senators Introduce Resolution to Update Federal Mask Mandate Rules
Making another group 'special' is anti human, anti community and frankly I will never give a fuck about individual groups. We are one.
Yeah yeah, if you weren't lazy to begin with, other people wouldn't have to chase up after your information to confirm or flick you.
FFS
It's the bee…
Elon Musk Unveils New Tesla F-15
STARBASE, TX—Entrepreneur and all-around slightly insane man Elon Musk announced today he is releasing a new Tesla model: the F-15.
The all-electric fighter jet will be in production by the fall and is available for preorder now.
"We've revolutionized the electric car, and now, we're taking to the skies," Musk said at the official unveiling of the product held at the new Tesla factory in Texas. "Behold, I give you the power of flight!" Workers pulled a canvas sheet off the F-15 and revealed the sleek, next-generation fighter aircraft to the press gathered on the all-new Tesla runway.
"This puppy has it all: autopilot, a nearly 2000-mph top speed, advanced radar detection systems, and, of course, a giant tablet-like display in the center of the dashboard, just because we can!"
Musk also confirmed the F-15 can park itself, and you can even summon it with the push of a button on your key fob: handy for those trips to the grocery store or when you're trying to overthrow the government and need to make a quick getaway. "Don't leave home or attempt to topple a tyrannical government without it!"
"Tunnels!" he added for no reason in particular, leaving many onlookers confused.
At publishing time, Musk had confirmed that consumers can only purchase the F-15 using Dodgecoin.
https://babylonbee.com/news/elon-musk-announces-new-tesla-model-f-15
One America News Network, [25.06.21 22:12]
The Real Story - OAN Maricopa & Fulton Similarities with Rep. Jody Hice
https://rumble.com/vj1nml-the-real-story-oan-maricopa-and-fulton-similarities-with-rep.-jody-hice.html
https://t.me/OANNTV/1834
One America News Network, [25.06.21 22:07]
Sen. Paul: Fauci ‘willing to lie’ to get people vaccinated
https://rumble.com/vj1i0n-sen.-paul-fauci-willing-to-lie-to-get-people-vaccinated.html
https://t.me/OANNTV/1833
KanekoaTheGreat, [25.06.21 21:10]
[ Video ]
ARIZONA🚨
Bernard Kerik Explains Why Democrats Are Terrified of The Arizona Audit
There are cameras everywhere and you can see everything within inches in the Arizona Audit. Including, overheard cameras at each audit table.
"The Democrats are scared to death of the outcome. They know the outcome is going to be that Trump won Arizona. But that's not their greatest fear. I think their greatest fear is they know that audit is irrefutable. They're not going to be able to say this is some scam, this is a joke, they did something wrong. They can't do it. Everything is captured. Every single thing is captured by video with an enormous amount of supervision and oversight that nobody is going to be able to say this was corrupt. So whatever comes out of Arizona is going to be real. And, I think that it is going to prove that Donald Trump won Arizona."
Video:
https://rumble.com/vj2039-bernard-kerik-explains-why-democrats-are-terrified-of-the-arizona-audit.html
https://t.me/KanekoaTheGreat/569
KanekoaTheGreat, [25.06.21 22:50]
[ Album ]
Report:
https://www.atlanticcouncil.org/in-depth-research-reports/the-long-fuse-eip-report-read/
https://stacks.stanford.edu/file/druid:tr171zs0069/EIP-Final-Report-v2.pdf
https://t.me/KanekoaTheGreat/572