2 weeks ago i lost my doggo and i am still feeling like shit, if anything i have become more black pilled, more disillusioned, and just want to see it all burn. We have faggots singing about coming for our children, we have bureaucrats trying to mandate poisons to people door to door, so many things going wrong, and i know things are happening, but i am tired of this fucking war. I hate feeling angry and lost and bitter, like i have the fires of hell burning me up inside. i try to find solace from the Bible but even that has become more confusing and filled with such obvious lies that i no longer know what truth is, i want to love, but the people i do just do, not or are not capable of understanding this hell we see before us. I am tired and lonely and fed up that all these fucks walk free while good innocent people are sacrificing themselves on the alter of public perception and the media lies. How do i find hope anymore, i lost my best fucking friend and i just do not see the point anymore, all i want is it to stop. Sadly i fear we still have a longer road and i try to stay comfy but i find nothing to give me comfort. Go out side, sit alone, i try to draw and i just feel empty there also. Memes used to give me comfort to create, but i don't even know if that ever mattered, everything is so beyond our individual control. Does this fight against evil even matter at the end of the day, i want to believe we have done something important here, that we have mattered as a small part to try to shift this world for the better, but if the bible is to be believed we still have more chaos and anger and death before us, and what is the point, i want to pray, but no longer have the words as they just seem filled with hatred towards this whole fucked up situation. Sorry for fagging like this on the line but i miss my friend.
the sad thing is i can't, my health is bad as it is, so caring for myself is hard enough. My dogs used to always be there for me as well and with out them this anger seems insurmountable.
Tate seems like a very good boy, adorable face. they give us so much and help take so much away and their smiles fight back against so much darkness, they are the bravest little soldiers.
i wish i could, my mobility is failing sadly part of the reason i am here so often, shit posting and memeing and fagging apparently. My doctor said there might be a way to get me a service dog since i most likely will be wheelchair bound sooner than later. So that could happen maybe. thanks for the suggestion though if i can find a way to a place maybe i can in the meantime.
thank you for sharing that, i have practically become a vegetarian at this point, i don't want anything to suffer and even my abject hatred towards these things we fight i try to find some semblance of the ability to forgive like Jesus taught. I don't want to be the monster that i know i could become, and the only thing stopping me is knowing if i do i won't see my boys again. Because otherwise i would find new words for Pain and fear towards these fucks, creative people are a bitch to deal with when it comes to abject cruelty. I just know my boys would not want that for me either. But it is hard.
with everything i go through this is something i truly do believe.