Dr. Jill's Diary
Diary?
Have you ever heard of "Calgon the bath bead?" POTUS Joe keeps talking about him, saying he's trying to steal all the earth's ammonia. Satan only knows why, perhaps he has a lot of windows to wash, or Hunter says he can make methidrine out of anhydrous ammonia, and the aliens are smoking it!
You see what I have to put up with diary, and why I carry a little sterlind vial of 'chrome in my purse. They say it belonged to Marie Antonette but Gotha at the Magick Shopper say you can never bee sure which is why it was only 10 k.
Diary - you cannot tell ANYONE this, but I'm having special feelings for someone, and I think that it's going to be mutual. People say that's not possible with toddlers but my triangle tells me different! Seriously diary, it's serious. I even made an offer to her parents which they're thinking over right now in temporary La Migra custody, our new mobile detention facilty now outside Marfa, a small colony of "crafty" women in the middle of ol' redeck Texas! Fingers crossed!
The magic is working, diary. Lynn de Rothschild told me, whenever your feeling down, turn to satan, give him your sorrow and pain through the blood of the innocent you scrifise. It sounds like a trite platitude diary, but I'm sure it's why I'm having feelings for a little brown nina I've only seen in surrvellance vidoes. Well, the nice INS man says as soon as the parents X the papers with a little of the old red stuff the '''la nina is mine!"
I do not know how we got on this topic diary, I'm getting as scattered brained as Hunter, who's been researching the earth's ammonia, "for the Big Guy" he says. I just know I'm going to get a call from Anderson Cooper telling me Hunter's been trading ammonia futures with dodgy gay criminals from Vanuatu. Honestly, isn't it every mother's worst fear? Being extorted by that vampire sticks in my craw!
Hunter's a grown boy now, and you can't expect me to watch him every minute or even review supposed tapes, they say prove he was dealing with entities by those things are so easily faked today or whatever. I'd like to cram the smary fruitbat Underhanderson Vanderbarf back into his casket and lock the masauleum door and throw the key into POTUS Joe's old limepit.
Anyway dairy, at dinner tonight, which Joe thought was breakfast, he threw his All-bran at at staff, stood up and declared he had another message from Calgon the Bath Bead. He said the message from Calgon was to "anons worldwide" (?) to "STAY COMFY" which sounds to me like Hunter is getting stuck with 300,000,000,000 tons of ammonia.