Thoughts of suicide are actually a desire to see change in the world but feeling hopeless that anything can bring about that change except suicide. It actually means your a good person and what you are seeing is the truth; how rotten all these people truly are.
This is why everyone gets and deserves death and almost everyone dies without having any proof of the real Living God because God does not find them worthy of proof nor of life.
Having that sentiment is good thing, it means you care and are sensitive to suffering. If you learn about self sacrifice instead, by trying to bring God's kingdom on earth; you will eventually be answered with proof. Then even in death, of which you may never die after that point, you will never be alone again.