Dear Mr Putin,

If you're on board tonight, I'd like to make a request. Like really soon, I'd like to see the whole Rothschild family camping in cardboard boxes at my local Walmart parking lot.

And I'd like to watch them rummaging around for cigarette butts on the ground as they walk toward the nearby freeway off ramp to setup their latest business enterprise that involves holding up a cardboard sign with a snappy bible verse scrawled on it and a "God Bless You" at the end.

Thank you.