Dear Lin Wood,
I'm going to need a lawyer. Someone has slandered my good name. Someone has called me out as a terrorist in front of 6 billion people…AND I WANT TO SUE THAT PERSON FOR EVERY DIME HE HAS!!! Which, as I am to understand is many millions of dollars. I will give you half of anything we recover, but we must hurry, 80 million other people are about to do the same thing….I think we have a case…