Not kidding at least 50 times a day i find myself out loud i hate this life. So many feel this way. Please research "crucify the flesh". Awmi.net is a great resource. Listen to the audio archives with headphones. Do this now. Audio teachings, scroll down and listen. Search topics that jump at you as well. Headphones and all devices off except teachings. Talk to God first, ask Him to silence all thoughts and voices that are not from HIM that are liars and to make you hear HIM and what HE wants you to learn. I promise i will stay until HE takes me. You promise as well, okay. Fren