I Woke up this morning with a clear heart check on remembering to keep the perspective in my head of what "true sacrifices" are that are being paid by those greater than me in this cause.
That being said, there are inherent consequences to this endeavor that are truly starting to manifest in my life both socially and economically.
To the point that I have tried to disengage from coming here several times.
Yet I keep coming back and have for months. I see this as the great spiritual battle of our times. There is no turning back. There will be no analyst job or bright future at the end of this journey for me as my criminal record would make that impossible.
Three years ago I lived in a homeless shelter as a washed up drug addict approaching middle age and went to college. It has been an an amazing story of the redemption aspect of God's power.
My journey inspired others and God willing I will receive my A.S. this May.
But I tell you, my "handlers" are getting quirky and think my cheese has slid off my cracker for good.
It is likely I will soon be in worse state than I started out in years ago. I'll be "that guy" who threw another opportunity away.
But I must face God someday and look up and be able to say I did the best I could to honor my duty to this world he has given us.
I thank you for this opportunity to be here.
God Bless Anons
God Bless Autists
God Bless Patriots.