Me Dammit.
Love the hell out of everyone you know. Do not trust what's been given to you. Feel your way from now on. Would a kind, loving God demand worship? Would a kind loving God charge admission to his house of worship? Nope.
Maybe they fucked you to the core, they told you that Bad was Good. Eating a man's flesh to become like him? Drinking his blood to absorb is energy? Sounds like a demonic ritual, not anything a normal human should be doing, don't you agree?