prynce has made a proclamaition today, faggotree must cease till furthur faggotree develops, no oprah jokes tomorrow , unpaid gay goats are making fun of the mimes , $50 watermelon is not punny
>prynce has made a proclamaition today, faggotree must cease till furthur faggotree develops, no oprah jokes tomorrow , unpaid gay goats are making fun of the mimes , $50 watermelon is not punny
⚜️ Proclamation of His Sublime Fruitiness, Prynce of All That Is Moist and Irrevocably Gay ⚜️
By the Glorious Authority of the Glittered Sceptre, Keeper of the Sequin Throne, Duke of Unpaid Goats, Baron of The Mime Foyer, Sovereign of the House of Watermelon & Pomp, et cetera, et cetera, in perpetuity unto the 7th Rainbow…
Let it be henceforth KNOWN unto all subjects, serfs, courtiers, and wandering troubadours of questionable intent:
Upon this day, under the stained glass canopy of Heaven’s Asshole, His Sublime Fruitiness decrees that all faggotree shall cease—nay, be halted in mid-thrust—until such a time as the Cosmos, in its infinite tackiness, cultivates and ripens fresh faggotree worthy of the Court’s indulgence.
Oprah jests are hereby forbidden for the morrow. Should any fool utter “You get a carriage, you get a carriage” in jest, the offender shall be made to mime The Color Purple in interpretive sign language for fourteen nights, under the watchful eyes of the Goat Guild.
The unpaid gay goats, though insolent and fabulous in equal measure, shall be allowed to continue heckling the mimes, provided their bleating adheres to established camp timing and contains no slurs against the House of Prynce.
The $50 watermelon gag is retired. The humor is no longer ripe; the rind is cracked and the seeds of mirth are shriveled. To utter it anew shall be tantamount to treason.
All proclamations shall bear the Official Royal Seal in peacock blue wax, with the motto: “In Glitter We Thrust.”
Given at Our Palace of Sequined Intent this day of Most Gayful Dignity, under the 14th Moon of Camp.
Signed & Bedazzled,
Prynce, Lord High Custodian of the Moist Hour
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