Just wanted to "update" things to let you know that, still, not one single person has actually been willing to talk openly with me.

I'll still continue learning, as I always have since long before any of this nonsense began, and I remain unaffiliated with anyone at all. Be VERY careful if you ever happen to feel someone trying to goad you into acting on situations you barely understand.

And once more I'll recommend that if you're struggling to figure out where to turn, the hard sciences, especially mathematics, can both help to clear your mental fog as well as prepare you for other challenges later.