Boasberg, the Merciful
Boasberg 2028: “I run the country anyway, might as well make it official.”
Associated Press
March 14, 2026
Washington, DC
Chaos erupted at the Hearts of DC wedding venue last night when Judge Boasberg stormed the ceremony shouting “PRIMA NOCTA!”. The bride was abducted by his security detail and has not been seen or heard from since.
Where’s your Sergeant?
Blown up, Sir!
>>24379575 is this the part where we get civil unrest from spontaneous protests with professionally printed signs, looting, burning, blocking traffic, everybody kneeling before Crockett?
>>24379584 one might hypothesize that paid criminals on staff are mandatory, typically various functional roles: bagmen (for bribes), procurers (drugs, sex trade), fixers (handle “problems”), liaison with Party apparatus criminal staff, state parties criminal staff, the criminal staff of each agency, department, and branch of govt and embassies.
We might call them the CIA
Judge Boasberg the Benevolent has issued a restraining order against the U.S. Marine Corps invasion of Iran
National Park Service officials have confirmed that plans for adding a new face to Mount Rushmore are underway.
Judge Boasberg has released Thanos with an ankle monitor, but seized his gauntlet with Infinity Stones intact. Sources familiar with the proceedings suggest Boasberg, in a bold move, plans to snap his fingers and establish Obama as the Eternal Potentate, deposing Kang the Conqueror.
>>24379624 a good clone is hard to find
>>24379638 yes there is a way to definitively identify a clone. what to do about it? Maybe there’s A Plan for that.