WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Trump announced on Monday that his administration had officially entered into ceasefire talks with the Democrats.

"I'm hoping they'll stop trying to kill me," he said. "It would make my presidency run a lot smoother if I could just be alive."

https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-enters-ceasefire-talks-with-democrats

https://x.com/TheBabylonBee/status/2048794322326147137