F*cking shit writes itself. Or, watching a movie…
DICTIONARY: The phrase "up the river" typically refers to being sent to prison or jail. It originates from the geography of some prison locations situated up the river from populated areas. A different version of the saying, "up the river/creek without a paddle," alludes to finding oneself in a challenging, perilous, or sticky situation, particularly where escaping or resolving the issue is extremely tough or nearly impossible.