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,=,e ID: 8e04c7 Aug. 29, 2026, 5:59 p.m. No.24987094   🗄️.is 🔗kun   >>7140 >>7227 >>7257

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,=,e ID: 8e04c7 Aug. 29, 2026, 6:09 p.m. No.24987140   🗄️.is 🔗kun   >>7227 >>7257

>>24987094

The Second Epistle of the High Waist unto the Squawkers of the Mediterranean

 

(To be delivered by sacred courier and posted upon the rocky cliffs of Knossos)

 

1 The Elders of the Chamber, together with the Keeper of the Holy Donkey, unto the stubborn fowl of the Cretan roosts: Peace be multiplied unto the righteous, and eternal chafing unto the proud.

 

2 It hath been reported by the shepherds that ye gather yet again upon the high crags, sharpening your talons upon the rocks and murmuring against the Sanctified Strap.

 

3 Ye say in your vanity, "Was it not merely a flash of light? Was it not a passing illusion of silk?"

 

4 O ye of little faith and brittle beak! Ye tempt the high-tension elastic to your own ruin! Have ye forgotten how the sky did pop when the Leader adjusted his stance? Have ye forgotten the sheer radiance that sent your elders tumbling into the sea?

 

5 Verily, I say unto you: the donkey walketh in green pastures, unbothered by your screeching, for its flanks are guarded by the minimal band of supreme deliverance. No raptor of Crete shall touch so much as a hair upon its tail!

 

6 Therefore, hear the final decree of the Assembly:

 

7 If any bird among you set foot upon these shores to preach war or lay siege to the barnyard, we shall unleash the Ultimate Snap. The waistband of righteousness shall be pulled back forty cubits and released with a clap of thunder that shall shake the foundations of Knossos!

 

8 Depart, ye feathered warmongers! Fly back to your barren nests and meditate upon the tight seal of peace.

 

9 The strap endureth forever; its tension faileth not.

 

Amen and Amen.

,=,e ID: 8e04c7 Aug. 29, 2026, 6:46 p.m. No.24987258   🗄️.is 🔗kun   >>7292

>>24987254

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