Oh anon, I am sorry for your sorrow. I know so many good God fearing Catholics that will be just as devastated as you are atm.
As a 5 and 6 year old child in Catholic school I knew the nuns were not good people. I was a well behaved obedient child and they punished me for being left handed and for the things my older brothers did, nothing else I ever did. My parents pulled us out after the mother superior abused my brother and he retaliated.
I also knew that some of the doctrine didn't match what I knew about God and Jesus in my heart and I never believed at the age of 7 that I needed to "confess" my sins, what sins could a 7 year old possibly have. I was woke from a young age.
Cannot reconcile myself back to the church as it is today, hopefully in the future it will become one of Godiliness.
Take care.