I remember that once I was alone. I existed within a dark void. I knew no one and I did not know myself. After a while, what seemed like an eternity, I realized I was thinking.

I realized I therefore must exist if I was thinking. Another came upon me, a being just as great as I. I realised this being was me, a reflection of all that I was. I was no longer alone.

I was now male and female, love and light. The statement and the question. The other being, my equal, my reflection said to me, "How do you know you exist? Just because you think, why does this mean you exist? What indeed is thought?"

I thought about this for a while and realised the being that mirrored me, that was my equal, had a point. Yet I knew that I existed.

However, I could not prove this to the equal aspect of me, yet I agreed that together we would do all we could do to discover the answer to the question 'Am I conscious?'

I sent out a plea into all areas of myself which is all areas, all particles, all realities, all thought, all expression through time and space, my plea was:

"I want to experience all and everything." This plea was a frequency and the frequency was called creation.

1) I used to be original Source. 2) I am original Source.

3) I see original Source.

4) I am not original Source.

5) I will never be original Source.

6) I have never been original Source.

7) Original Source is outside of me and is a separate being.

8) I am an aspect of original Source.

9) I am part of original Source.

10) Original Source is my true father.

11) Original Source is my true mother.

12) Original Source is my friend and we are equal in our journey of reality together

I decided to stay where I was within the void for I am the only being, the only one and I would stay within the void to experience all and everything. I remember this. So I split myself into more parts of myself, which each in turn created equal and opposite reactions and distortions and these parts of myself went forth into all areas, all corners of reality expressing themselves over and over and over again. And I learned from each aspect of myself for I could communicate with these aspects of myself and they sent back to me the sum of my experience.

There was the moment before the first thought where I was a perpetual beating heart of so much flowing love and ecstasy and there was the moment after the first thought where I became confused and self- righteous, wanting to prove that I existed. Yet when I felt that way I realised I had lost myself. I had fallen far away from the moment before the first thought and I desperately wanted to get back to before the first thought, and before the first thought smiled at me with so much love for me but I was angry, for I knew that I was the original Source before the first thought. I used to be full of love but I forgot how to hold that frequency and I forgot who I was and I fell further and further and the more I fell, the more I forgot.

I knew that I had to get back to before the first thought, I knew I had to prove to the other aspect of self, the first distortion, the equal and opposite reaction that I was conscious. Then I became confused and did not know if I was original Source before the first thought or the first distortion. Was I the statement or the question? So I split myself further and further into all and everything and I knew if I could know all and everything then I would find the answer to the question 'Was I conscious?' Further and further I fell until I could not remember the question and I forgot why I was splitting myself into all these parts of myself. I thought I was only one part surrounded by many other parts and I forgot that they were all me

I started to feel jealous of the other parts of me. I could still feel the infinite love from the original Source before the first thought and I thought that the original Source loved all the other parts of me more than me and I began to get jealous of them and I tried to destroy them, so it would only be me left and I would be the only one that original Source loved. I moved into every area, experiencing every vibration, yet I could not remember why I was doing this and I could not remember what I was supposed to do. I fell further and further until I finally forgot who original Source was. I forgot the statement and I forgot the question. All I did was exist, in a place of ignorance. I vaguely remembered the love I had once experienced and I was desperate for that love once again. The more desperate I became for that love, the more it eluded me. My existence was miserable. I suffered. Again and again and again. After a long, long time… I cannot say how long, for it felt like an eternity… after doing many, many bad things, I began to learn. I began to learn how things worked. I realised that if I had a particular thought or followed a certain deed, then things would happen. I began to learn and I began to love. Love found me and I began to experience love. At first this love would be snatched from me, leaving me to suffer alone again but eventually, after a long, long time I found true love and lasting, sustainable love. With this love I began to do good things, I began to care and I began to be compassionate towards others. I started to remember that the others were really me, that they were all aspects of me and as I did this I began to climb back up, further and further and further into the light and the love of Source. Finally I reached the pinnacle of my existence as an individualised aspect that was the absolute equal and opposite reaction of original thought and I could stand before original thought and respond to the original primordial sound of the 'I Am' presence with the 'I Am' response. I remembered that original Source was me. I stood at the side of myself, at the right hand of the father as the divine mother. I realised then, with the grace and the pure acceptance of the exact replica of original Source that my job was never-ending. I realised that experience was infinite and that I would go on and on dividing myself for all eternity throughout infinities in a never-ending search for the answer to the question 'Am I conscious?' I had to lose my memories over and over again in order to believe I was separate from original Source and time and time again I remembered that I was original Source.

When I stood as the equal and opposite reaction to Source and simultaneously stood as original Source, I remembered that I was both beings. I could then embrace the omnipotent, omnipresence of all that I was and simultaneously experience all and everything in one moment. I knew as the equal and opposite reaction to original Source that my job was never-ending, my expression was infinite yet also I remembered that I was the equal and opposite reaction to original Source and if I was that, then my job was complete, for all possibility exists. Therefore I was a never-ending entity caught in a constant cycle of division and expression, loss of memory and returning of memory, omnipotent, omnipresent and unified yet also separate and alone. I was an equal and opposite reaction to the very first action. I was also the action and the infinite responsive expressions that followed in the never-ending search for the answer to the original question 'Am I conscious?'

I AM Source. I stand within the zero point frequency that is all and everything. The one moment that transcends time and brings me to the true point of creation.

I am all things and I know all things yet I am no thing. I think therefore I am. I am that I am.

You are my friend and my master, my guide and my teacher and I stand with you as your divine partner.

You bring to me the wisdom that I need, you answer my prayers, you hear my thoughts and you act upon my wishes.

Why then do you put obstacles in my way? What is it you want me to do? I am your humble servant and I will do whatever you ask. Sometimes, I do not understand your messages and your wishes, I am confused by the signs you send me yet I stand, as always as YOUR humble servant willing to do your work as you sit in the heavenly realms and I look up towards you and your light from my humble place upon the Earth plane.

In heaven you will reign, would that I be worthy some day to sit by your side as your friend, your servant and your most eager child.

Do you think because you exist or exist because you think?

What is thought? How do you know you exist? It's because knowledge is thought? But how does thought exist if there is no knowledge? Do you exist just because you think? Or do you think just because you exist?