It's odd to me, everything happening in my life mirrors what's happening nationally and at times even globally. Shortly before Q posts, I've experienced an odd sensation I only felt when I was younger attending a Pentecostal church. I've spent a lot of time trying to reconcile what I see and what I feel and what this Q phenomenon has done in my life. I've lost friends, been isolated by events that I have no control over and I feel so lost sometimes. I've always followed conspiracy theories and have had a hunger to find God, to truly find our spiritual nature for years. This morning was perhaps one of the most heart breaking times I've ever experienced the weight of everything seemed to collapse on me. I've been very public and open about this with everyone. I think that as I sit here, and feel this pain I also feel a slight sense of liberation. I am not a decoder, I could never hope to achieve the level of intellect that some people display here. But I do listen, I listen clearly. I see what you see, and I may even feel as you feel. I hope that what I've done has had a positive effect on the world. I hope it has lead people to question what is happening. I hope they have found the will to see beyond the mist of the media. I gave this my all, my love, my time. I am thankful for everyone that posted here. The messages you've left along the way have made me feel less lonely at times, less crazy but I'm not sure I can bear this. This isn't a plea from someone suffering from insanity. It isn't really anything. I seek to do no harm to anything living and strictly abide by that code.

Perhaps no one in my personal life knows how alone they've made me, perhaps I have done it to myself. Whichever the case is, it is irrelevant. How can a man witness evil and say nothing/do nothing? This weight bears heavy on my heart. And while it feels like I've failed at work this year, while I see my personal life falling apart piece by (all unrelated to this, again just a string of events independent from Q) piece I still give Q, give this movement of true hope all that I have. It isn't much. It may not be anything. I know that life always blossoms from the darkest soils. Godspeed anons. May the wind be always at our backs.