Know what sucks?
Being so depressed and anxious that I can't sleep at night, and I can't stay awake during the day.
I'm just a running ball of constantly exhausted and I might fall asleep at any moment, unless it's a normal time to fall asleep, and then I just… can't.
You'd think I'd be used to it by now but like… I'm not sure what to do with being permanently exhausted.
and of course, that doesn't improve until something positive happens, but all these people still have their lives that they get to enjoy while we can only watch and wait for it to be the opportune time to drop whatever hammer… but even then… that's just the beginning and it'll take a paradigm shift to no longer be working on a trickle down system of justice.
already a hippy in terms of food, and the exercise tapered itself off because this isn't a self-image issue.
My own as above so below that it relates to…
There is no healing for me until corrupt psychopaths can longer hide behind and be protected by shitty laws they set up to be able to fuck everyone over.
I'm fine with me. It's things outside of my control that need to happen and the wheels of justice move painfully slow.
I've been in the fight since before Q showed up and this is pretty much the only thing that keeps me sane.
Otherwise I'd have nothing to do with my days and I'd just be waiting for the courts to get around to things when they feel like it.
Meanwhile, I'm blacklisted and there is no work for me that covers anything near rent let alone whatever it takes to survive beyond a roof.
No one talks to me but anons and screen names because I've never been up to anything beyond "saving the world" and at the point I probably don't even know how to people properly.
Is there rehab to being abused by society at large?
I guess that's what a vacation is supposed to be but you need like… money for that.
Not just that everything is a lie, but everything is run by liars and is based on lies.
Kavanaugh was simply the most public face of "guilty before proven innocent".
Meanwhile, my apartment is my jail cell and there is no limit on my sentence unless I can convince the courts that I've been needless abused enough.
The defense even bold faced admitted what they did in the motion for summary judgement… and still feel they shouldn't be held accountable.
As below, so above.
I WAS a working artist who went into advertising school instead of some place that gave a fuck about your feelings.
Data entry fast as fuck, consulting on various projects, fire spinner (had a teaching series of vids for a bit), fine artist, worked at a photo/video rental house doing prep and studio, managed a professional dungeon/studio for a bit.
Like, out of everyone I went to undergrad with, I'm one of two who actually did something with art.
But, really easy to smear someone in the art community who doesn't play the identity politics game and people just lapped it up so all my professional contacts went bye bye. That's what made me actually become a Trump supporter.
Other'n that… odd jobs. Random shit.
Beyond dishes, I've assisted a guy doing signs/neon work (glorified go-fer), computer literate, did a stint at a charity thrift shop for a while, promoted for a couple adult clubs, drove around a sign truck for while…
But really, everything culminated in "oh, I was being trained for Q."
Again, I'm fine with myself. I can't force the courts to do anything though so it's legit outside of my control.
It's just kind of a pain in the ass when my sleep schedule lines up with Italy.
A break from the routine would be nice. Everything's managed.
I sleep like a rock. Then I wake up and I get these sudden urges to sleep like a rock again. Body doesn't wanna be up when the sun is, for some reason.
I ear right, and I feel like coffee PUTS me to sleep, honestly. I dunno why it does that.
I haven't owned a TV in yeeeeears. I play Guild Wars 2 so little that people yell at me every time I pop in to do something with anyone who takes it even remotely seriously.
What I need is something to do and somewhere to be that is just more… nothing.
Remember what happened the last time they pissed off an artist?
He became the poster child for antifa.
Never had a knack for it.
Photos I can make money with because y'just sorta bang it out and everyone's happy.
The fine arts… basically been working on the same project since 2005.
Forgot to mention, I work really well with Maths folks.
Was going to work on an marth/art class for a university, but the black list scared that off.
At one point I was trying to hire people to do some wire work for to the tune of $2,000… but due to the blacklist, no one would work with me.
I was going to make a fire spinning app… but due the blacklist I couldn't get anyone to work with me and eventually other people I'd talked to made the thing.
It's not even that I can't work… I can't even hire anyone.
So… this is what I do all day.
I do Q and I manage a group of amateur mathematicians to break RSA and ECC.
It passes the time.
This sounds like a good option, but I'm not really thaaaaaat into star wars.
https://apnews.com/dcbf9525ebb346689eb60326a416a84b
McConnell’s year-end wish: Getting Congress to legalize hemp
We've talked about this multiple times, mathspazz.
gonna move to super colliders and particle accelerators next?
yeah, I doubt Q's gonna be sending us checks, but I appreciate the sentiment.
At least I'm not stuck in a cube dealing with HR because I blinked in a sexist way.
I want a signed hat.
That'd be neat.
And a 47th floor Trump Tower Penthouse.
That'll make decompression way easier after all this.
Oooh, and it should have one of those robochef thingies.
https://www.politico.com/newsletters/florida-playbook/2018/11/29/acostas-sweetheart-deal-for-molester-oliva-leads-hospital-wars-transgender-drama-in-pasco-more-dead-dolphins-352898
https://www.businessinsider.com/youtube-theories-what-caused-california-wildfires-2018-11
YouTube is teeming with conspiracy theories about the California wildfires. Here's what really may have caused the flames.
"Crazy wildfire theories
The most widely circulated theory seems to have originated with the far-right conspiracy group QAnon, which often propagates wild assertions about Hollywood actors and high-ranking officials."
https://www.wonkette.com/stupidest-man-on-the-internet-knows-just-how-to-spin-this-jeffrey-epstein-thing
"But the actual facts of the story undermine the whole Pizzagate/QAnon conspiracy, and that's not something a lot of extremely stupid people are willing to give up. In the QAnon narrative, Donald Trump is leading a secret war against pedophile sex rings in Hollywood and the government and is on the verge of exposing them all. The mass arrests were supposed to happen on November 27, but they're sure they're coming soon. After all, why would an anonymous person on the internet lie to them?"
https://www.splcenter.org/hatewatch/2018/11/29/hatewatch-headlines-11292018
leads to:
https://www.mediamatters.org/research/2018/11/28/Mapping-the-meme-How-a-viral-image-went-from-4chan-and-QAnon-supporters-to-Trumps-Twitter/222176
Mapping the meme: How a viral image went from 4chan and QAnon supporters to Trump’s Twitter
LeeeeeeGOOOOOOOY!!! uh-JEWnkinnnnnssss
https://www.techly.com.au/2018/11/30/birds-arent-real-new-conspiracy-theory-claims-birds-spy-drones-us-government/
Conspiracy theorists claim birds aren’t real, actually spy drones for US government
"Conspiracy theories are one of those peculiar byproducts of the information age. We have gay frogs, pizzagate, birthers, anti-vaxxers, flat-Earthers, Qanon, people who claim Australia doesn’t exist and others who swear the Olson twins are really just one person."