Catching up, just got in from workfagging. Q said "You have the Keystone" but I don't see a definitive answer from Anons of what the Keystone is…
As bad as it sounds, you kind of get numb to it. Not completely, just somewhat. Before Q started I was digging/involved with Pizza/Pedo research and saw some videos of things happening to Children. I will never forget them, or what happened to that backpacker but I use it as motivation to "Trust the Plan" and carry on. Having balance is a good thing as well..