Shagged by a rare parrot.
To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women.
FYI…While I understand your need to laugh at the FE subject, at the risk of being called a shill I would like to point out the obvious.
FE is a geocentric model as opposed to Sphere Earth which is a Heliocentric model.
Since the movements of the planets and stars are different in each model, there would never be a time where a flat earth shadow is going to be shown on the moon. That's just not how it works.
I do see what you were going for though, good one!