>>4944466 lb
>>drop acid
>>perceive flying spaghetti monsters with laser beam eyes chasing me
>>reality
>>be morbidly obese at Walmart
>>drop my Mountain Dew
>>reach as far as I can out of my wheelie bin, ass crack hanging out for days, can’t teach it, reposition my hoveround, knock over display of carrot cake Oreos, grab one package for later, still can’t reach mug Mountain Dew
>>hot little teenage Latina picks it up for me
>>”here ya go”, she smiles
>>catch my breath after the strenuous exertion, red faced and wheezing, I tip my fedora “thank you milady”
>>SHES SO INTO ME
>>REALITY