I came to the board tonight feeling very stressed, worried, depressed (almost feeling suicidal but not quite) as I have SO much on my plate and I am worried about my future. Already up to my eyebrows in bills that I can't pay, just learned that tonight will be my last night at work…I'm not technically unemployed but until my 'superiors' find another site for me to work I will not be getting paid in the meantime, so it's almost the same as being unemployed.

Usually when I come here my spirits are lifted by the humor and some of the info I learn…but tonight is a different story. So much craziness and fighting and everything else going on right now has actually made my mood deteriorate.

I know all of this sounds pretty selfish (and maybe it is) because there are so many people going through some of the same things I am and sadly many are suffering through much, much worse….I am so alone, no family to reach out to and most of the few friends I had have slowly fallen away because I never leave the house unless I'm going to work and to stop at Walmart once a week; beyond that I have not been out of the house since the summer of 2014. I just can't see a way forward…I just feel like no matter what things are going to continue to suck and most likely worsen.

The anons on this board are the closest thing I have to family/frens now. I feel so alone though…like I am literally cut off from the rest of the world…and I don't think I can manage to lift or keep my feelings up any longer.

(Sorry for the lengthy shitpost…I just needed to get it out) SadAnon

>>5023404

Thank you for taking the time to mock me, anon.

Feels great, really….thank you.

>>5023418

Thanks, fren…I am definitely with you regarding Hillary winning…I know we would be living in a hell on Earth at this moment.

As for the rest, I can barely afford the groceries I buy…I can't go out and buy nice clothes or anything else for that matter. I did splurge and bought 7 pairs of new underwear this week…but only because I've been wearing the same 5 pair for 5 years and they were literally falling apart.

I don't have any confidence left in me to try and find a new job…I couldn't look an interviewer in the eye and try to convince them that I am great and would make a great employee.

I just feel…..depleted.

But sincerely, thank you for reaching out, anon.

>>5023439

Thank you, fren.

>>5023446

I did….thanks, anon.

>>5023453

Thank you for the many sound suggestions, fren.

If I may ask, how did you survive without getting paid for an entire year??

>>5023464

Thank you for that…I know this board isn't really the place for 'muh feelz' but sometimes anons who are in deep despair come here an unload; I just don't understand why some people seem to get off on kicking another human being when they're down…it still mystifies me after all the time spent here (and IRL).

>>5023470

Right now I make $13/hr….until 0700 and then I will be making $0/hr for who knows how long.

>>5023526

Well I truly hope things get better for you, too, fren…sooner rather than later.

>>5023528

Well I'm already down…I see nothing wrong with lying on the ground while I'm here. Thanks for the advice, anon.

>>5023547

Between 39 and 41….and yes, I have had jobs-I guess it could even be called a career-in the past that payed far more than I'm currently making.

>>5023533

So true…I will try.

If i were in better spirits it wouldn't bother me all that much…but when I'm this far down everything hurts…even unkind/hateful words.

>>5023538

I've never tried to get public assistance, and I know I sure as hell need it a lot more than certain people who are on it-yet they drive around in Cadillac Escalades & carry Louis Vuitton handbags & wear 10 pounds of gold jewelry-and they buy steaks & lobster with damn EBT cards while I eat Ramen noodles…smh…so I might give that a try (applying for unemployment…not the other crap…kek)

>>5023543

I see your point about the shills, anon.

And I am being completely sincere…I wanted to hold it in but I needed to let it out.

Again, thank you for reaching out, brother.

>>5023555

It does help.

I used to go out every weekend, back when I still had weekends off work….but I had a very bad experience one night and it scared me so badly that I didn't want to go out anymore, not to anywhere. I thought eventually I'd shake it off but instead of becoming less introverted it became more intense…I even had borderline panic attacks when I ventured out to Walmart…I would literally be dripping sweat by the time I made it out to the parking lot.

I hope things stay positive for you & hope that your life continues to improve, fren.

God bless you.

>>5023556

Good advice, yes.

All of those are difficult for me to do though.

I used to be a firm believer in God/Jesus for most of my life…but the more I learn the more I question my faith (what's left of it)…sometimes you can pray until you're blue in the face and more often than not they seem to go unanswered.

I do have my 2 dogs & honestly they are one of the very few things that have kept me from throwing in the towel altogether or offing myself…I have to keep going…for them.

>>5023572

For the past 15+ months, being here is the "something" that I did…70% of the time it's good here…but on the really bad nights it does take a toll on me after a while. I want to know what's going on…and I get both depressed and very angry when I read MSM garbage…this is where I get my news-but at least it's already been "filtered"/digested by anons so it's not as bad…but maybe I do need more time away from here…idk.

My 'talent' is limited autism…that's about it these days.

>>5023604

Thank you, fren…I hadn't even considered some of those temporary solutions…just to get me out of this financial hole I'm in. I've worked since I was 15 years old, worked almost non-stop since then; it would definitely make a difference just to have a couple hundred dollars a month for necessities (food, hygiene items, etc)…might give some of those you suggested a try, it can't hurt.

ThanQ.

>>5023617

It definitely can't hurt to try.

Thanks, anon.

>>5023729

^^^^^^^^^^^

This is what comes to mind when I read the following crumb….(pic related); what else would cause that type of reaction from most people?

>The truth would sound so outrageous most Americans would riot, revolt, reject, etc.

>>5023901

And what about this statement:

>Who controls NK?

Who really controls NK?

Don't think of a single person.

Think of a powerful entity. ←—-

(pic related)

>>5023926

>>5023916

>>5023918

It's the only answer that makes sense (to me) when you put statements like that out there…to me it makes almost everything fall into place.

Hard to swallow, right?

>>5023942

And while you ponder all of this….ponder why POTUS wants so badly for us to have a Space Force…Air Force protects our skies from enemies, Army/Marines/Navy/Coast Guard protect our lands and our seas….so, logically thinking, Space Force would protect…..?