I know your pain. There is nothing like watching a loved one self destruct in the haze of alcoholism/addiction. Last summer I feared 24/7 my son was going to die from heroin overdose. He had lost his aura, had become a literal walking zombie. He would come home every 10 days or so to crash. I never had the guts to refuse him a place to stay. I didn't then, nor do I now, think it was the right thing to do. I would just encourage him to seek help and in the interim I gathered info about resources. Sometimes he'd make the calls, set up an appointment, and then be gone again. This went on for months. Then last summer by the grace of God he reached out for help for real and entered a 21 day in patient program. From there he went to a sober living house and is there now. He is working the steps, sponsored and sponsoring others. He has his life force back. Whenever I hear other parents complain about their kids doing or not doing whatever we parents perceive they should do, I think about how fortunate I am that my son is alive, he is well, and he is helping others. I cannot wish for anything more. My son is alive, Just For Today. God is good in his infinite mercy.