Maybe the chef is an ass and unmarried mom was looking for a white knight, considering ….it's a bar. A hotel bar at that. Anon probably ducked a grenade. 4 kids? I would have been telling her I had one testicle and 2/3rds of my dick blown off in Da Nang in '68.
However, the newly outed bartender could have been promising. It's not gay if you're the one receiving the blow job and you do what you gotta do to meet your needs on the road.