Never interfere with your enemy when they're destroying themselves.
You should not feel ashamed. Do cancer patients feel shamed for falling ill? You need serious help anon and you deserve to get that help no matter the perceived consequences (risk of losing job, apartment, image, etc). There is no shame in that. You think a cancer patient should be shamed for seeking treatment that upends their lives? No. They do so because if they don't, they risk losing their lives. Time to make some difficult choices, but there should be no shame is seeking help. You are no different than a cancer patient seeking help and treatment. It sucks, it's scary, but you have no real alternate choice.