Feel for you anon, I'm finding myself in a similar boat. I'd recommend calling some friends and family who you can trust, and coming up with a bugout plan if things get too dangerous. Not sure what your finances are like, but if you have the extra money, you might want to buy some basic preps. Rations, water, first aid kit, flashlight, fire extinguisher, etc. If anything, it'll buy you some peace of mind.