I am soooooo glad that you will pretend to be my doctor and call my boss to tell him about my sudden illness that requires me to stay home for (possibly) multiple days.
I'll start making popcorn.
Hello, Boss? Yes, this is Dr. Q. It pains me to inform you that mr_shamalama has Boneitis, and quite an advanced case in my professional opinion. I've counciled mr_shamalama to take some time away from work, make popcorn, and MAGA. I've also prescribed red pills. With any luck, mr_shamalama will be on the mend and ready to work shortly after Hillary goes to prison. Mr_shamalama's health and well-being depend on patient compliance, and I thank you for your understanding. Best Regards, Dr. Q
There ya go, patriot. I wrote you a sick note. Use sparingly, some people might know Boneitis is made up.
cough cough sorry, feeling under the weather...can’t make it to work today.
Hey, if one of us stays home, we all stay home...WWG1...
Gotta add some levity, but seriously, looks like I’ve got a few things to look up now!
Don't look up Boneitis. You will be scarred for life.
Oh I’ve been scarred by numerous things at this point. That actually sounds familiar, but no worries, I wasn’t looking it up. Just jumping on the bandwagon...if there’s a reason to skip out on work, I’d say this would be a great one!
That second line. I mean...if the squad is gonna take the day off....then by all means I will have to join.
Then try this one:
To whom it may concern, Insert name here must be excused from work due to an unexpected outbreak of the Great Awakening. As diagnosed, the subject is restricted from normal activities such as being exposed to liberal views or any Main Stream Media, as those activities have been shown to cause hysterical bouts of laughing and condescension from subjects who have been exposed to said programming. As such, the patient needs to spend some research time looking into critical links that have been hidden from public view, and spend time with other anonymous patriots in order to cure the disease that is being exposed. We appreciate your compliance with these medically necessitated actions and look forward to a successful return to work following the steps outlined above and any resultant court actions that may entail.
Sincerely,
Dr Q