Probably I am Chaotic Good
For a long time I tried to be lawful - doesn't work for me.
I was mistaking being lawful with being good.
It seemed to me that if I was not following rules I was a bad person.
That was a mistake. I can't live like that, I can't live by other people's rules - that's not for me.
Rejecting other people's rules was an important step for me.
However after that the feeling of shame remained for a long time.
I have to feel it and consume it. All of it, so that nothing is left.
Now I almost always rely on my intuition.
I trust that deep inside I am a good person and will naturally do good.