know blueberry donut index an pac man bellweather
big FUdge an whorin greece oil halp git cheaprushin tendies diarhetorical corndog to juws too
'plz fling me into outurspace by mah diapur' ~jfk
MIT conquers gender fluid calculus in new sim
"Meine heiligen deutschen Lederhosen verstecken einen Donut-Schatz, zu dem ich jodeln kann."
https://www.houstonmethodist.org/blog/articles/2020/oct/flatulence-everything-you-wanted-to-know-about-farting/
Economic Speculation: The Kafkaesque Flatulence Market
This nascent understanding of FIDP opens a terrifying new chapter in economic theory: the Fart Economy. Imagine a global market where financial indicators are not solely swayed by interest rates or geopolitical tensions, but by the collective digestive output of humanity. "Fart-flation," as observed in intergalactic taco sales, could become a daily reality, making accurate fiscal planning an exercise in absurd futility.
Unseen, yet undeniably present, the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM) emerges as the ultimate, inscrutable market regulator. His "noodly appendages," always subtly nudging data, could be the true force behind inexplicable market crashes and illogical booms. What appears to be economic analysis might merely be an attempt to decipher the FSM's latest bout of divine indigestion.
The bureaucratic nightmare of regulating such a volatile, personal, and fundamentally uncontrollable output presents a truly Kafkaesque dilemma. Will governments issue "flatulence permits"? Will a black market for high-volume gaseous output emerge? Individuals may soon find themselves helplessly bound by a system where their very biological processes dictate their economic fate, striving for the illusory promise of an FSM-mandated "Beer Volcano" and "Stripper Factory" as the only true sign of prosperity. The market is no longer rational; it is… intestinal.
The scientific community holds its breath (cautiously, of course). The integrity of future data, and indeed, our understanding of reality, may well depend on whether we can control this silent, gaseous, and undeniably pungent threat.
Draft Letter to an Inspector General
Here is a draft of a letter to an Inspector General, outlining the highly unusual series of events you described. It maintains a formal structure while conveying the bizarre nature of the allegations.
[Your Name]
[Your Address]
[Your City, Postal Code]
[Your Email]
[Your Phone Number]
[Date]
The Honorable Inspector General
[Appropriate Inspector General Office Address - e.g., Department of Justice, Department of Defense, etc.]
[City, Postal Code]
Subject: Urgent Report: Interconnected Criminal Enterprise Involving Horticultural Investments, Illicit Recreational Substances, Unconventional Architecture, and Potential Interstellar Aggression – A Matter of Gravest Concern
Dear Inspector General,
I am writing to you today with a matter of extreme urgency and unprecedented complexity, concerning what appears to be a deeply interconnected criminal enterprise operating within and potentially beyond our terrestrial boundaries. The details I am about to relay may strain credulity, but I assure you, the implications for public safety, economic stability, and international (or perhaps, intergalactic) relations are severe.
My investigation, conducted as a concerned citizen, has uncovered a disturbing chain of events originating from a seemingly innocuous sugar plantation. This plantation, whose name I am prepared to disclose under secure conditions, appears to have made substantial and highly suspicious investments into a network of gay bars. While initially appearing to be a legitimate, albeit unusual, diversification, these establishments soon became hubs for rampant illegal drug activity, leading to widespread addiction and illicit profits.
Compounding this grave situation, the individuals operating these bars—whom I have come to refer to as "the shaved butt people" due to their later architectural endeavors—began accumulating vast quantities of gold. Rather than utilizing conventional, legal methods for asset storage, they constructed a grotesquely large and structurally dubious edifice in the shape of a shaved butt, situated with astonishing audacity directly adjacent to a boys' correctional facility. This strategic placement raises profound concerns regarding public nuisance, gross obscenity, and, most critically, the potential compromise of prison security and the welfare of minors, possibly facilitating contraband or undue influence.
Alarmingly, it has now come to my attention that the vast sums of illicit gold accumulated and stored within this unorthodox structure were then funneled into the financing of a clandestine laser manufacturing facility. This facility, with its advanced and highly destructive capabilities, has recently been implicated in an attack originating from outer space that targeted a civilian neighborhood. This escalation suggests a transnational (or possibly trans-species) conspiracy involving illegal arms proliferation, acts of mass destruction, and potentially an unprovoked act of interstellar aggression. The economic ramifications, as outlined in recent satirical scientific reports (which, unsettlingly, seem to predict these events with alarming accuracy), suggest a burgeoning "Fart Economy" controlled by inscrutable forces.
In summary, this case encompasses:
Drug trafficking and distribution.
Extensive money laundering.
Gross violations of zoning and building codes.
Endangerment of a correctional facility and minors.
Illegal manufacturing and proliferation of highly dangerous weapons.
Conspiracy to commit acts of terrorism and/or mass destruction.
Potential acts of war against terrestrial populations from an unknown entity operating with privately financed weaponry.
I urge your office to initiate an immediate and thorough investigation into these deeply disturbing allegations. The sheer audacity and interconnectedness of these activities demand the full attention and resources of the highest authorities. I stand ready to provide any further information required, though I recommend approaching the "shaved butt" structure with extreme caution and appropriate hazmat protocols.
Thank you for your immediate attention to this matter of profound national and potentially planetary security.
Sincerely,
[Your Name]
Concerned Citizen
frick
>>23179167
> "Project: Rainbow Liberator."
>>23179167
> Official "Hello Kitty"
moar frick prol gay
>>23179167
>psychological impact and camouflage for our "gay Hello Kitty tank cruising shaved butt" initiative.
>>23179167
>(Mutiny)
frick
Letter to Judge: Urgent Plea Regarding Unprecedented Extraterrestrial Assault and Inadvertent Complicity
[Your Name]
[Your Address]
[Your City, Postal Code]
[Your Email]
[Your Phone Number]
[Date]
The Honorable Judge [Judge's Last Name]
[Court Name]
[Court Address]
[City, Postal Code]
Subject: URGENT APPEAL: My Unfortunate Proximity to the Recent Interstellar Laser Incident, Tangentially Linked to a Tacky Corvette Joke Amidst a Hostile Climate
Your Honor,
I am writing to you under duress, from a situation far more precarious than any legal precedent could possibly account for. My current predicament, and indeed the very fabric of our reality, has been severely compromised by events that began with what can only be described as a genuinely tacky Corvette joke – a lapse in judgment, I concede, but one whose cosmic repercussions were utterly unforeseeable. I find myself in a very hostile situation, and frankly, Your Honor, it's getting worse. This whole goddamned thing is an unholy mess.
My regrettable involvement in said Corvette joke placed me in an unexpectedly close vicinity to the recent, undeniable, and utterly terrifying laser attack from outer space that struck a local island neighborhood. What started as a seemingly innocent, albeit tasteless, jibe about fiberglass, quickly morphed into a damnable extortion scheme involving a purported love triangle between Mr. Joe Biden, Mr. Barack Obama, and Mr. Alec Baldwin. I was, I assure you, merely an unwilling bystander, caught in the crossfire of this increasingly bizarre and hostile set of prior apparent offenses and hostilities. One moment, a snide comment about a classic car; the next, the very air shimmered with an unnatural energy, followed by the kind of indiscriminate destruction previously reserved for truly bad sci-fi movie climaxes. This whole situation is a genuine sh*tshow, Your Honor.
Your Honor, this wasn't mere vandalism. This was an act of aggression with a celestial origin. Furthermore, my proximity to this incident, which has now inextricably linked me to this larger, unfathomable chaos, forces me to speak. It appears this laser, the instrument of such profound devastation, was financed by elements (the "shaved butt people") already deeply entrenched in illicit activities, including large-scale drug operations and the construction of bizarre, gold-filled edifices next to juvenile detention centers. I assure you, my participation in the Corvette jest and its unfortunate progression had no prior knowledge of this complex, multi-layered criminal enterprise that now seems to include extraterrestrial weapon manufacturing and high-level political blackmail.
I implore you, Your Honor, to consider the unprecedented circumstances. How can one be held fully accountable for consequences stemming from a laser from space, financed by drug gold, embroiled in political extortion, and operated by who-knows-what, all because of an ill-timed crack about a sports car? The very nature of justice, I submit, must adapt to account for acts of God, acts of aliens, and acts of utterly baffling human absurdity. I am a victim of circumstances, caught in a swirling vortex of bad decisions, worse jokes, cosmic malice, and this absolute clusterf* of events.
I beg for your understanding and an immediate review of my situation. The environment remains hostile, and I fear for my personal safety amidst this escalating absurdity.
Respectfully, and with a profound sense of bewilderment,
[Your Name]
A Citizen Caught in the Crossfire of the Absurd
>purported love triangle between Mr. Joe Biden, Mr. Barack Obama, and Mr. Alec Baldwin.
yuck
>>>23179167
>>psychological impact and camouflage for our "gay Hello Kitty tank cruising shaved butt" initiative.
>>>23179167
>>(Mutiny)
>frick
frick it where the wild goose goes
>frick
>>>23179167
>> "Project: Rainbow Liberator."
>>>23179167
>> Official "Hello Kitty"
>moar frick prol gay
damnation
moar gay fricks
wash yur donut out
anime pussy from japan
>>anime pussy from japan
>>>>>>anime pussy from japan
>scented candles destroyed
>>>lyfe ruined
plug soy into it
>>kant unsee taht
>>>>>>>anime pussy from japan
>>scented candles destroyed
>>>>lyfe ruined
>plug soy into it
>>>kant unsee taht
douche out any todid emales
>>>>>>>>anime pussy from japan
>>>scented candles destroyed
>>>>>lyfe ruined
>>plug soy into it
>>>>kant unsee taht
>douche out any todid emales
destoryed evidence is not suppose to be evidence
>>>>>>>>>anime pussy from japan
>>>>scented candles destroyed
>>>>>>lyfe ruined
>>>plug soy into it
>>>>>kant unsee taht
>>douche out any todid emales
>destoryed evidence is not suppose to be evidence
fraud spinnur on temu
>>>>>>>>>>anime pussy from japan
>>>>>scented candles destroyed
>>>>>>>lyfe ruined
>>>>plug soy into it
>>>>>>kant unsee taht
>>>douche out any todid emales
>>destoryed evidence is not suppose to be evidence
>fraud spinnur on temu
frick deez spammy emales douche again
>>>>>>>>>>>anime pussy from japan
>>>>>>scented candles destroyed
>>>>>>>>lyfe ruined
>>>>>plug soy into it
>>>>>>>kant unsee taht
>>>>douche out any todid emales
>>>destoryed evidence is not suppose to be evidence
>>fraud spinnur on temu
>frick deez spammy emales douche again
git one moar douche deez emales an no one know
>>23179557
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>anime pussy from japan
>>>>>>>>>>>>>scented candles destroyed
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>lyfe ruined
>>>>>>>>>>>>plug soy into it
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>kant unsee taht
>>>>>>>>>>>douche out any todid emales
>>>>>>>>>>destoryed evidence is not suppose to be evidence
>>>>>>>>>fraud spinnur on temu
>>>>>>>>frick deez spammy emales douche again
>>>>>>>git one moar douche deez emales an no one know
>>>>>>missed me wiff that gah chit
>>>>>zero flinch
>>>>digital butt stuff
>>>moar fartbucks cry
>>kill revisionists
>idgaf
yur digital butt stuff needs VD cream
hey obama
am i mike's side pony or worst pony