"Did you hear? Paul Wiggur was spotted at the obsidian monolith yesterday. He tried to deposit three Rump Widgets into the secret account, but the Greek Shekels started screaming. Apparently, the Ill Flotant Necromancy isn't hitting the margins this quarter because the Lamenturs forgot to mourn the fiscal year. Absolute shambles."
Just signed 400 NDAs on Idollartree napkins. My hand is cramped but my vibes are legally binding. #FeelingsLawyur #NDAnxiety
If your Comorbid Computur isn't beeping, are you even living? Or are you just a Reverent Zombie without a data plan? #SphincturFeelings #GlitchLife
Why does Mo$kunt’s Faykgina sound like a dial-up modem today? Is the Niggcrack account full of lint again? #DigitalUsury #MoMoneyMoProblems
Blackrock just sent me a bill for "Existing while Ambivalent." Paul Wiggur is going to court for this one! #VibeLitigation #BlackrockBills
Is it a Rump Widget or is it a solidified thought-form of a Prior Apparent’s bad mood? You’ll never know! #IdollartreeMystery #WidgetWatch
My Comorbid Computur just sent a "Lament Alert." Time to go buy some Rump Widgets to feel better/worse. #LamentAlert #RetailTherapy
Mo$kunt’s Faykgina is now accepting Drumpf Coupons for a limited time. Get in there, zombies! #CouponCraze #ArchonDiscounts
Just saw a Reverent Zombie trying to return a used Rump Widget. The Idollartree clerk just hissed until he left. #CustomerService #ZombieProblems
The "Homo-saturated" energy in Franch Poleland is reaching critical mass. Someone open a window or a secret bank account! #EnergyCrisis #GahycistVibes
If the E.T.s wanted us to be happy, they wouldn't have given us Sphinctur Feelings and a Porcelain Throne. #AlienConspiracy #UnhappyByDesign
If Mo$kunt gets their horns back, we’re all doomed. Keep the Faykgina buzzing! #ArchonWatch #KeepThePeace
The Ill Flotant is so dense you can carve it with a spoon made of Niggcrack. #EconomicDensity #SpoonTheory>>24288154
> Someone open a window or a secret bank account! #EnergyCrisis #GahycistVibes
> given us Sphinctur Feelings and a Porcelain Throne. #AlienConspiracy #UnhappyByDesign
>Keep the Faykgina buzzing! #ArchonWatch #KeepThePeace
>Just saw a Reverent Zombie
Blackrock is opening a new "Lamentur Spa." It’s just a room where you cry into a rusted bucket. #SpaDay #LamenturWellness >>24288193
Mo$kunt’s Faykgina is now compatible with USB-C. Talk about an upgrade! #TechProgress #ArchonTech
Paul Wiggur: "Justice is a Rump Widget that doesn't break when you drop it." #JusticeVibes #LawyerQuotes
Remember: In Franch Poleland, the only thing more certain than death is the interest rate on your feelings. #FinalThought #GahycistGossip
I saw a Drumpf Coupon floating in the Ill Flotant. It looked so peaceful. #CouponZen #FloatingVibes
Blackrock just bought my dreams. They gave me three Rump Widgets and a Drumpf Coupon. Fair trade? #DreamDeals #BlackrockBuyout
Just saw a group of Reverent Zombies protesting the lack of "Lamentur Options" at the Idollartree. #ZombieRights #RetailProtest
Mo$kunt is now selling "Faykgina Scented Candles." It smells like a server room fire. #MerchDrop #ArchonAroma
My Comorbid Computur just called me a "Lamentur Loser." I’m filing a workplace harassment suit against the E.T.s. #TechHarassment #FeelingsLaw
My Greek Shekels are tarnishing. I need to sacrifice a Rump Widget to the Ill Flotant. #MaintenanceCosts #NecromancyFix
The Prior Apparents are hosting a potluck. The main dish is "Lamentur Stew." Pass. #PotluckHorror #AncestralCooking >>24288266
Just saw an E.T. trying to explain "feelings" to a Reverent Zombie. It was like watching a toaster talk to a brick. #CulturalExchange #AlienFail
[YouTube Video] TITLE: 10 IDOLLARTREE HACKS TO BEAT THE E.T. OVERLORDS! 🛸 Thumbnail: A pony hiding under a tinfoil hat.
Mo$kunt’s hornless forehead is looking extra shiny today. Someone’s been polishing the digital usury. #ArchonGlowUp #HornlessEnergy
Is it "Homo-saturated" in here or is it just my new Rump Widget emitting truth-rays? #WidgetTruth #SaturationPoint
>Fill that mouth with 🍆
Paul Wiggur here: If you’ve been married to Mo$kunt for more than six months, you may be entitled to a free bucket of Niggcrack. #ClassAction #VibeLaw
>Just saw a group of Reverent Zombies protesting the lack of "Lamentur Options" at the Idollartree. #ZombieRights #RetailProtest
>I saw a Drumpf Coupon floating in the Ill Flotant. It looked so peaceful. #CouponZen #FloatingVibes
>Remember: In Franch Poleland, the only thing more certain than death is the interest rate on your feelings. #FinalThought #GahycistGossip
plz halp silverstein retire wiff 1031 in brony paradise
[YouTube Video] TITLE: MY LAMENTUR STORY (HOW I LOST MY TENDIES) 🍗 Thumbnail: A sad pony with an empty plate.
[YouTube Video] TITLE: TOP 10 PRIOR APPARENT SCANDALS! 📜 Thumbnail: A scroll with a "CENSORED" stamp.
Paul Wiggur: "A Drumpf Coupon is worth more than a thousand Greek Shekels if the lawyer is ambivalent enough." #EconomicAdvice #PaulWiggur
neil duz butt stuff shockur #zomg
>plz halp macron gitin touch wiff his innur natalie portman
Why settle for a normal mansion when you can have one haunted by the Prior Apparents' bad debt? #RealEstateGoals #HauntedMansionLife
If you don't pledge your Tendies, the Overlords will take your Iwidget's power cord. #TendieWar #OverlordThreats
My Rump Widget just told me I have "Excellent Sphinctur Control." I’m blushing! #WidgetCompliments #FeelingGood