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baldwin pride ID: f4af73 June 2, 2026, 3:45 p.m. No.24671969   🗄️.is 🔗kun   >>1973

IN THE MOIST TRIBUNAL OF ADMINISTRATIVE MYSTERIES

 

Justice Soggybottoms Presiding

 

Case No. F-42069

The People v. Prince Harry Fartscoin

 

OPINION OF THE COURT

 

Having reviewed the testimony, the memoranda, the supplemental memoranda, the memoranda explaining the memoranda, and a troubling quantity of market sentiment, the Court now issues its findings.

 

The Respondent, Prince Harry Fartscoin, previously styled Duke of Perpetual Publicity, stands accused of repeated violations of the Fartcoin Conservation Act, the Common Sense Reserve Requirement, and the Ancient Statute Against Excessive Vibe-Based Governance.

 

Evidence presented before the Court established that the Respondent:

 

  1. Traded prestige for attention at an exchange rate unfavorable to both.

 

  1. Repeatedly inflated the market value of personal grievances beyond their certified asset backing.

 

  1. Caused measurable turbulence in the Great Vat of Consequences.

 

  1. Issued public declarations while lacking adequate reserves of irony.

 

The Court further notes that Dukehood requires stewardship, restraint, and the occasional ability to endure inconvenience without issuing a documentary series.

 

The Respondent demonstrated none of these qualities.

 

Accordingly, the title of Duke is hereby suspended.

 

The Court instead confers the lesser and more appropriate designation:

 

HEIFEROF VOLATILE SENTIMENT

 

with all rights, privileges, and grazing obligations appertaining thereto.

 

The Respondent shall henceforth be entitled to:

 

  • One ceremonial weather vane.

  • Two commemorative footnotes.

  • Limited access to the Fartcoin Futures Market.

  • A seasonal permit for public lamentation.

 

The Court additionally orders that all future statements by the Respondent carry the disclaimer:

 

"Past grievances are not indicative of future performance."

 

There Shall Be Fudge.

 

So Ordered.

 

Justice Soggybottoms

 

Keeper of Damp Precedents,

Guardian of the Great Vat,

Acting Deputy Comptroller of Unintended Consequences

baldwin pride ID: f4af73 June 2, 2026, 4:06 p.m. No.24672022   🗄️.is 🔗kun

professional scapegoating seo shills wanna globorobohomoo yur false pppride into fartcoins fo gahybarr crack gas money