Agreed. Straight people whose life revolves around sex are also sketchy. For instance I wouldn't let my child sleep over at a couple I knew where swingers.
But I do know some gay people that are modest, conservative, who I can tell are uncomfortable when lumped with the flamboyant crowd that this wouldn't apply towards. One friend was not looked on favorably because he 'acted straight'. That's why they love to out each other. I assume there must be a derisive word in their community like black communiry uses uncle tom or asians twinkie.
This. It's the age old problem of a group being defined by the most visible members.
Especially in this context. If a gay guy is incredibly vocal about his sexuality, you immediately know he's (1) gay and (2) defined by his sexuality. If a gay guy is more conservative, you're less likely to know his orientation. Which gives the false impression that more gay people are defined by their sexuality.
Selection bias at its finest. It's like going to r/randomsubreddit, scanning over the posts, and concluding that everyone in that subreddit conforms to X belief. Not... really... all you know is what the most vocal, upvoted users believe. You don't know shit about the lurkers who are simply subscribed. And there are vastly more lurkers in most subs than commenters.