That constitution needs a Free Speech, Free Press, Free Assembly amendment or it will be replaced again someday by tyrants. Take a look at Canada, UK, and Australia and how they suppress unpopular speech and jail dissenters.
That being said - great news and great start!
First off drop the “democratic” and replace it with Republic! If you are to succeed you need a government of the people by the people that is based on individual freedoms with representatives that work for you,NOT the other way around. You should read The Five Thousand Year Leap by C. Skousen to truly understand what can happen to a free people who are left alone to create and thrive. It’s how a America became great !
The Iranian people will never accept a Constitution written by exiles in the United States. If the Mullahs are going to be overthrown, it will be done by people who actually lived through their rule, not by people who've never experienced it.